It's true when they say there is always something, right? Well, pretty much both of our cars are broken, at least mine is and Nic's is on it's way. He tried fixing it yesterday because we got a new starter off of ebay. We thought that was the problem. Well, it wouldn't start after the starter got put in yesterday. So, who knows! We have to drive to Chicago this weekend so hopefully one of our cars will make it. I'm still praying about the passport! Hopefully it comes back in time.
So, I'm really excited for lunch today. I'm going to TGI Fridays with this girl who used to be my really really good friend. I haven't talked to her since Nic and I have been married because we kinda went our seperate ways. Well, her fiance got in a plane crash right before Thanksgiving of 2006 and died. It was AWFUL!! And she randomly texted me the other day and wanted to go out to lunch. So, I'm pretty stoked to talk to her. Hopefully I know the right words to say if her late fiance is brought up. He was a great guy and they were perfect for each other. They had just bought a house and things were going so great for them. It was one of those insanley tragic accidents that just breaks your heart.
It makes me appreciate all my time with Nic because you never know what may happen! Life is so fragile and short!
Nic and I are happy!!!!! I feel so good right now, we have our little tifts here and there but we actually resolve it maturely and move on. He is being so sweet and so lovey dovey! Which is what I like. haha. It's wonderful!
But, anyways, I better go work...blah....oh yea..and grab some java..haha
Peace&Love
Tuesday, July 31, 2007
Monday, July 30, 2007
Just a couple days away!! Oh man when something can go wrong something will..
Guess what...my passport is in my maiden name!!!!! My parents called last night to inform me that my passport is in my maiden name and I would not be able to go on the trip unless I get if fixed. Okay, getting a passport in the first place is hard but getting one in 3 days. So, I have to go get new pictures, overnight my new pictures, marriage certificate and all these other forms. Have to get it to Washington D.C. before 10 AM tomorrow and then hopefully they can issue a new one and send it back by Friday! Please pray for me girls..I really need it. I can't go if I don't get this dang passport. I'm so so so glad that we didn't notice it at the airport! Then I would have been up a creek with no paddle..for sure.
Other than that life is good. We went and looked at a house last night. We really want to buy a house but we are taking it slow trying to find out the right one and where we want to live. We really like this small town about a half hour away. But, the problem is..it's a half hour away. All our work and school is that far away and with gas prices and what not it would be tough on us. So, we are trying to find the perfect fit for us. There are a lot of other towns that are cute and small that are not so far away. We just really want to get out of the big city.
Nic and I had a great weekend! We just hung out and didn't do much.
Welp, I guess there's not much else..but please keep my passport in your prayers. I hope you ladies all have a wonderful week!
Peace&Love
Guess what...my passport is in my maiden name!!!!! My parents called last night to inform me that my passport is in my maiden name and I would not be able to go on the trip unless I get if fixed. Okay, getting a passport in the first place is hard but getting one in 3 days. So, I have to go get new pictures, overnight my new pictures, marriage certificate and all these other forms. Have to get it to Washington D.C. before 10 AM tomorrow and then hopefully they can issue a new one and send it back by Friday! Please pray for me girls..I really need it. I can't go if I don't get this dang passport. I'm so so so glad that we didn't notice it at the airport! Then I would have been up a creek with no paddle..for sure.
Other than that life is good. We went and looked at a house last night. We really want to buy a house but we are taking it slow trying to find out the right one and where we want to live. We really like this small town about a half hour away. But, the problem is..it's a half hour away. All our work and school is that far away and with gas prices and what not it would be tough on us. So, we are trying to find the perfect fit for us. There are a lot of other towns that are cute and small that are not so far away. We just really want to get out of the big city.
Nic and I had a great weekend! We just hung out and didn't do much.
Welp, I guess there's not much else..but please keep my passport in your prayers. I hope you ladies all have a wonderful week!
Peace&Love
Thursday, July 26, 2007
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Links to other Thursday Thirteens!1. (leave your link in comments, I’ll add you here!) |
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Okay, I will follow suit with Michelle, but I never watch cartoons so I'll go with TV shows...
1. King of Queens (Nic and I watch it together everynight! Our fav show)
2. Wife Swap
3. Grey's Anatomy
4. Numbers (LOVE this show!!)
5. Extreme Makeover
6. Extreme Makeover Home Edition
7. Farmers Almanac
8. Conan O'Brien
9. Sex and the City
10. Scrubs
11. That 70's Show
12. Cops
13. Super Nanny
Wednesday, July 25, 2007
thank you guys for your support in my little life issues. I appreciate it all so much!!
Nic and I are doing alright. He went to Chicago yesterday and comes back today, so it was the first night I had without him since we were married. It was sad, but it felt nice to have some breathing room. He is being such a sweetheart now, but who knows how long it will last. I try and keep my head up and not be an insecure, jealous, baby!! haha. Because, we all know how un attratctive that is.
But, the kink in the already kinked up chain is my parents. They were expecting us to go to counseling and we haven't even had a chance. So, they send us an email telling us that they are deeply dissapointed in us for not going to the meeting yet. And that we need to put our marriage first before any other things i.e. work, school. I was really hurt by their email because it was pretty bitter and uncalled for. At least I thought so. I called them when I was down and asked for their advice. But, come on, I'm an adult here and you don't need to slap my wrist because I didn't go to counseling the day YOU wanted me to. I never said we are not going. We just don't have time. They cannot grasp that. It bugs the crap out of me. Seriously, they have complete job flexibility whereas Nic and I can't tell our bosses when we can work, they tell us. Just like almost everyone else in America!
So, I'm hurt by my parents, but Nic and I are doing a little better. Which is always good! I just pray pray and pray that it stays that way!
I feel like my relationship with God is so lax. It's such a hard thing sometimes to keep your head towards Him when everything is so confusing and falling apart. It's so much easier to slip and do the wrong thing. Why can't the right way be easy! Why does life have to be such a struggle sometimes!
I'm freaking out about our trip. We leave in 9 days! Oh man 9 days! That's like nothing, and I feel so unprepared and scared and nervous and anxious and I have no idea what to expect. It's going to be such an amazing trip, but the closer it gets, the more reality sets in. My life has been a rollarcoaster since we have decided to take this trip, and I just hope that I am emotionally ready to be there in 9 days. I can't counsel kids if I need help myself! So, pray that I can get my heart straightened out in this short amount of time.
But, I can't to so downtrodden all the time, so the sun is shining and I go to lunch in an hour and a half so hey!
Peace&Love
Nic and I are doing alright. He went to Chicago yesterday and comes back today, so it was the first night I had without him since we were married. It was sad, but it felt nice to have some breathing room. He is being such a sweetheart now, but who knows how long it will last. I try and keep my head up and not be an insecure, jealous, baby!! haha. Because, we all know how un attratctive that is.
But, the kink in the already kinked up chain is my parents. They were expecting us to go to counseling and we haven't even had a chance. So, they send us an email telling us that they are deeply dissapointed in us for not going to the meeting yet. And that we need to put our marriage first before any other things i.e. work, school. I was really hurt by their email because it was pretty bitter and uncalled for. At least I thought so. I called them when I was down and asked for their advice. But, come on, I'm an adult here and you don't need to slap my wrist because I didn't go to counseling the day YOU wanted me to. I never said we are not going. We just don't have time. They cannot grasp that. It bugs the crap out of me. Seriously, they have complete job flexibility whereas Nic and I can't tell our bosses when we can work, they tell us. Just like almost everyone else in America!
So, I'm hurt by my parents, but Nic and I are doing a little better. Which is always good! I just pray pray and pray that it stays that way!
I feel like my relationship with God is so lax. It's such a hard thing sometimes to keep your head towards Him when everything is so confusing and falling apart. It's so much easier to slip and do the wrong thing. Why can't the right way be easy! Why does life have to be such a struggle sometimes!
I'm freaking out about our trip. We leave in 9 days! Oh man 9 days! That's like nothing, and I feel so unprepared and scared and nervous and anxious and I have no idea what to expect. It's going to be such an amazing trip, but the closer it gets, the more reality sets in. My life has been a rollarcoaster since we have decided to take this trip, and I just hope that I am emotionally ready to be there in 9 days. I can't counsel kids if I need help myself! So, pray that I can get my heart straightened out in this short amount of time.
But, I can't to so downtrodden all the time, so the sun is shining and I go to lunch in an hour and a half so hey!
Peace&Love
Monday, July 23, 2007
Okay, I'm not sure where to begin. I think Nic is depressed or going through some kind of inner battle that I'm not invited to. We had a good night Friday and Saturday. Friday night he apologized for being so rude and we went and saw the Chuck and Larry movie. HILARIOUS by the way. But, it was so cute, I'm being a total girl here, but we laughed so hard through the whole movie and he kept laughing and putting his head on my shoulder. It was such a good time. Then Saturday was a good day. But, Sunday, well Sunday he went back to being grumpy and unattached and wanting to be left alone.
My car broke on Friday so we are carpooling too right now. So, once again this morning I was told to leave him alone. He has a calculus final today so I know he is stressed about that. But, come on man seriously. I just don't get it. And I don't know what I should do.
He is leaving tomorrow to go to Chicago for a day or so. His best friend from college is getting sent into the war and he wants to say goodbye. Chicago is about 5 hours away from us. I am kinda glad that he is going but than at the same time worried ya know. He is so not into "us" right now. It's horrible, and I'm miserable.
I tell myself that I am not going to let him bring me down. I am an incredibly cheery person. But, we are one flesh now, and how he acts affects the way I feel. I know this. And it sucks.
He plays poker online all the time, and just kinda looks dead in the eyes.
Please give me some advice on what to do. We were going to see a counselor but he keeps coming up with reasons not to go. He has to work, he is going to see his friend.....
I'm at a loss. I just want my wonderful, loving, sweetheart husband back. And I seriously don't know what to do. Than doubtful thoughts pop up in my mind, like does he even love me anymore? Which, would destroy me. I adore this man. And I just feel like he doesn't want to try.
Should I grant his wish and just leave him alone and give him space?? See if whatever is going on with him works itself out?? I don't know.
I just want to be at peace and be happy. I want a loving relationship with my knight in shining armor. But, how do I do it?? How do I win back this man who holds my heart?
Gosh, I'm such a pity case today. Sorry ladies but I just don't know what to do.
Thanks for listening!
Peace&Love
My car broke on Friday so we are carpooling too right now. So, once again this morning I was told to leave him alone. He has a calculus final today so I know he is stressed about that. But, come on man seriously. I just don't get it. And I don't know what I should do.
He is leaving tomorrow to go to Chicago for a day or so. His best friend from college is getting sent into the war and he wants to say goodbye. Chicago is about 5 hours away from us. I am kinda glad that he is going but than at the same time worried ya know. He is so not into "us" right now. It's horrible, and I'm miserable.
I tell myself that I am not going to let him bring me down. I am an incredibly cheery person. But, we are one flesh now, and how he acts affects the way I feel. I know this. And it sucks.
He plays poker online all the time, and just kinda looks dead in the eyes.
Please give me some advice on what to do. We were going to see a counselor but he keeps coming up with reasons not to go. He has to work, he is going to see his friend.....
I'm at a loss. I just want my wonderful, loving, sweetheart husband back. And I seriously don't know what to do. Than doubtful thoughts pop up in my mind, like does he even love me anymore? Which, would destroy me. I adore this man. And I just feel like he doesn't want to try.
Should I grant his wish and just leave him alone and give him space?? See if whatever is going on with him works itself out?? I don't know.
I just want to be at peace and be happy. I want a loving relationship with my knight in shining armor. But, how do I do it?? How do I win back this man who holds my heart?
Gosh, I'm such a pity case today. Sorry ladies but I just don't know what to do.
Thanks for listening!
Peace&Love
Friday, July 20, 2007
Nothing has changed. Nothing has gotten better. We sat outside the courthouse yesterday teetering on the edge of signing divorce papers. He doesn't want to put out the effort because he says there is no effort to give. I can't blame everything on him though. It takes two to sabatoge a relationship in this sort of way. I made an appointment to see a biblical counselor tomorrow. I hope he agrees to go with me. Please pray for us. We need it.
Peace&Love
Peace&Love
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
Today is my birthday and I was sooo spoiled last night!! But, today well, today is a different story. Sometimes I wonder about this husband of mine. Sometimes I don't understand why he can say the most hurtful things and than come back 20 minutes later and aplogize. Well, when is the change going to be visible!! So, I have decided to let go more. I'm tired of him being hurtful, so I am letting the grip go and we will see how things go from there. My heart can't take hurt from this man anymore. We love each other but we are in a rut! A serious rut! I think he is depressed, he sleeps A LOT. And I know that's a big sign. He is so stressed out all the time. He is so busy all the time. I hardly ever see him! My birth DAY sucks!
But, last night was alright. He got me a new down comforter, a human anatomy book for me going back to school, Some body cream for after the shower or bath and it smells SO GOOD, 2 necklaces, scrabble, rollarblades, a new coffee mug and a new fossil bag. No joke, I have never got so many presents on my birthday before! he was so sweet!
Life is hard. Life sucks sometimes. It's hard to keep the positive attitude constantly when you don't know where you are going. I feel like I let him down sometimes. And it kills me that I do. But, I'm not perfect ya know. No one is....
I love this man so much but why does it seem my life is consumed with trying to make us work. Why can't we just work and let the rest of life consume us?? Why can't we enjoy life.
I'm petrified of bringing a child into this world right now. But, I want a baby so bad. It sucks. Why can't things be good?? Give me some advice girls? What do you do to make things work. I really need some advice. My heart or his can't take the drama anymore!
Man, it sucks that I have to vent on my birthday. But, it's just another day.
Peace&Love
But, last night was alright. He got me a new down comforter, a human anatomy book for me going back to school, Some body cream for after the shower or bath and it smells SO GOOD, 2 necklaces, scrabble, rollarblades, a new coffee mug and a new fossil bag. No joke, I have never got so many presents on my birthday before! he was so sweet!
Life is hard. Life sucks sometimes. It's hard to keep the positive attitude constantly when you don't know where you are going. I feel like I let him down sometimes. And it kills me that I do. But, I'm not perfect ya know. No one is....
I love this man so much but why does it seem my life is consumed with trying to make us work. Why can't we just work and let the rest of life consume us?? Why can't we enjoy life.
I'm petrified of bringing a child into this world right now. But, I want a baby so bad. It sucks. Why can't things be good?? Give me some advice girls? What do you do to make things work. I really need some advice. My heart or his can't take the drama anymore!
Man, it sucks that I have to vent on my birthday. But, it's just another day.
Peace&Love
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